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Musicians use the rhythm method.
FORD (Acronym) Fix Or Repair Daily.
Alternate:
Found On Road Dead
Sex, and drugs, and rock 'n roll,
Speed, and weed, and birth control,
All you preps think you're cool,
Fuck you all, Stoners Rule!
Yo mama so stupid she took a cup to see Juice.
What do you call a dog wearing ear muffs?
Anything you want, he cant hear you.
An elementary school teacher, well versed in educational jargon, asked for a
small allotment of money for behavior modification reinforces.
Her superior saw the item and asked, What in heavens name is that?
Lollipops, the teacher explained
A college business professor could not help but notice that one of his students was late to class for the third time that week.
Before class ended he went around the room asking students some questions about the day's lecture. Of course, he made sure to pick on his tardy pupil.
"And Mr Reebs, would you be so kind as to tell us who it was that developed the theories behind communism?" the professor asked. "I don't know," said the student.
"Well, perhaps if you came to class on time, Mr. Reebs, you would know," said the professor.
"That's not true," the student protested. "I never pay attention anyway!"
"I must take every precaution not to get pregnant," said Edna to Priscilla.
"But I thought you said your hubby had a vasectomy," Priscilla responded.
"He did. That's why I have to take every precaution."